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Unscary Movie: Jinn, reviewed.
Chris Klimek
Turns out that this bitchin' Camaro, and not any of the film's various CGI flame creatures, is "The Firebreather." Image from Jinn's Instagram feed.
I took one for the team and reviewed the the un-super, non-thrilling supernatural thriller Jinn for The Dissolve. I can't say I didn't have fun, mostly because Rachel Manteuffel came with me.
Footnotes: When I mention Liam Neeson in The Phantom Menace in this review, I cite him by his real name rather than his character name in that movie, Qui Gon... Jinn. It's all connected. Also, I didn't have room or cause to mention that William Atherton also played unctuous TV reporter Dick Thornberg in Die Hard, one of my pantheon films. Or that Faran Tahir, who gets plenty of work but whom I always remember from that great prologue to J.J. Abrams' Star Trek from five years ago, is here, too.
Listen, all y'all, this is my review of Sabotage.
Chris Klimek
"Vhat did I tell you about those stupid cornrows!" Arnold Schwarzenegger and Joe Manganiello in Sabotage.
Both of Sabotage's prior titles, Ten and Breacher, make more sense than the one it ended up with. Actually, the title is no more nonsensical than the convoluted plot of David Ayer's gruesome, vulgar, throughly disreputable dirty-cop thriller. It's only just barely a Arnold Schwarzenegger vehicle, which is part of why it's the most satisfying picture he's made in 20 years. I reviewed it for The Village Voice.
Tête-à-Tête Offensive: Tender Napalm and The Carolina Layaway Grail, reviewed.
Chris Klimek
Laura C. Harris and Elan Zafir in Tender Napalm (Teresa Wood)
In one of the the shows at Signature Theatre right now, a woman (named "Woman") tells a man ("Man") in precise, step-by-step detail how she plans to sever his penis and scrotum.
In the theater next door, Beaches: The Musical is playing. Six of one...
I review Philip Ridley's Tender Napalm in this week's Washington City Paper. Plus Allyson Currin's The Carolina Layaway Grail, the inaugural production from DC playwriting collective The Welders.
Why yes, I am fairly pleased with the hed, thanks. It's one of the very few times I've ever managed to top my editor (and Heds Will Roll Tumblr proprietr) Jon Fischer's suggestion, which is on Heds Will Roll now though it's far more tasteful than mine. Then he came back and nailed the photo caption, so.
What About James? Maladies, reviewed.
Chris Klimek
James Franco steals some shaving cream, and 97 minutes of your time, in Maladies.
My review of Maladies, a deeply pretentious, long-shelved character study written by director "Carter" for star James Franco, is up on The Dissolve today. Curiously, Alan Cumming gets billing in the opening credits though he's in it for one brief, unmemorable scene. He has less screen time here than he got as the hotel clerk who hits on Tom Cruise in Eyes Wide Shut.
Habit, Run: Water by the Spoonful and Normal, reviewed.
Chris Klimek
In today's Washington City Paper, I review the Pultizer-winning drama Water by the Spoonful at Studio Theatre and Molotov's production of Normal, a play about the Dusseldorf Ripper.
The Shape of Things: Exposed, reviewed.
Chris Klimek
Burlesque artist Mat Fraser in Beth B's Exposed
I reviewed Exposed, Beth B's documentary about New York City burlesque artists, for The Dissolve.
Then, the night after I filed, I ran across a reference to B -- a documentarian whose work I'd never previously encountered -- in "Something Nice," a short story in Mary Gaitskill's 1988 collection Bad Behavior.
The world broadens.
Fear of a Dwarf Planet: Forum's Pluto and WSC's Orlando, reviewed.
Chris Klimek
David Zimmerman, Jennifer Mendendall, and Kimberly Gilbert in Forum Theatre's Pluto.
NOTICE: My reviews of Steve Yockey's "rolling world premiere" Pluto for Forum Theatre and Sarah Ruhl's adaptation of Virginia Woolf's 1928 novel Orlando at WSC Avant Bard are in today's Washington City Paper, available wherever finer alt-weeklies are given away yadda yadda yadda.